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Say Hello to Mr Unfaithful - 7 signs he is cheating
By: Eleni Neo
Date: 2007-01-17 00:49:49
 
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SayBefore reading this article put on ’Before he cheats’ by: Carrie Underwood

How can I tell if he is cheating?
Well, why are you asking? You must have a gut feeling about something going wrong in your relationship. All humans develop a sense of instinct, either through personal experience or watching others go through something similar. You know in your heart of hearts that there is something going on in your relationship that may be giving you a sense of insecurity and anxiety. I strongly believe that somewhere deep inside you may know that he may be in the process or well underway into a relationship with another person. What you are looking for is confirmation that this is really happening to you. Here are the most traditional signs of infidelity, along with a few myths.

1. Mr. Mood swings.
He will act differently towards you by either being extra kind or extremely mean. Your partner may choose to love you more than ever by treating you affectionately at times and other times he may be acting aggressively and picking a fight about something that he never used to before. Everything becomes your fault, you are a tyrant and he starts saying that he feels suffocated. The next day you are the most beautiful creature he has ever seen in his life, you are the moon and the stars, the whole world, you are... well you get my point. Unless they have been diagnosed with bipolar depression, this is a major sign that something is up.

So is he cheating on you? Being too suspicious isn’t right either. But there’re some signs of a cheating partner that are quite obvious...

2. Change of routine.
This is also a major sign that he may be spending his time with someone else. For example, if he has been calling you at 9 p.m. every day in the past and now you don’t get that call anymore for a significant period of time, and by that I mean approximately 2 weeks, then you know something is going on. If everything else is constant in routine, then the behavior that follows that routine should be the same also. This is a major warning sign and along with it come other signs that something else is occupying his time.

3. Change in leisure time with "the boys".
If suddenly your partner starts spending more time with his friend or friends and less time with you this could mean that the friend or friends may be another girl that he would rather spend his time with. Don’t misinterpret this sign. If you have just had an argument and he storms out upset and doesn’t come back for an hour or two, this is not an indication of infidelity. However, if for a few weeks now every other night is "Hun, I’m going out with my boys", then you have every right to be suspicious.

Say4. What I’d like to call "The mystery man"
All of sudden everything becomes a secret. You don’t know where he is and who he is with. He gives you one word answers to questions of his whereabouts. All of a sudden he screens your calls or hardly ever picks up when you call and takes hours to return your messages. He all of a sudden has to take grandma to the doctor or his pet had an appointment you had no idea about. Work became more demanding or his best friend had a crisis. Basically any excuse that he can come up with to cover the time that he went missing.

5. The NEW friend.
One day within your conversation your partner reveals that he has become friendly with someone of the opposite sex. He tells you that this new friend is in his life but that they are "just friends". If this is common practice in your relationship, all the power to you. But in most serious relationships friends of the opposite sex don’t come into the picture unless they are also in a relationship and you hang out all together as couples. This new friend may become a love interest some day.

6. LESS SEX/NO SEX
I was thinking how to put this in a more respectful way but I am just going to come out and say it. You have now become sexually frustrated. No more sex or a lot less sex with your partner. This is a major sign that your mate is getting some somewhere else. You try and try, you put on your special perfume, highest pumps you own and your best outfit. You have used all the tricks that you know would have had him begging for more. Nothing works! Well listen, unless he has some great excuse, like a nasty rash he doesn’t want to infect you with (but then again, that’s a sign within itself), there is no good enough reason why he would not want to enjoy a great night of exciting fun.

7. Change in grooming practice.
He all of a sudden starts to smell better than ever, wears nicer clothes, shines his shoes and sprays a little extra cologne when he goes out. Well, well if it isn’t Mr. Fabio himself! The days at the gym may start getting longer and instead of 2 days a week it has now turned into 5. Clean shaven all the time, he is hardly the man you used to know. Believe me, this new grooming practice is not because his mom made a comment about his appearance, it’s because there is someone he has his eye on. There is no way a man will go out of his way to look better for you now; he has become comfortable and secure in what he has and it’s time for something new. So, ladies, keep an eye out for this one.


Myths about infidelity.

Some theories are floating around as to what the signs are that he may be cheating. I personally do not strongly believe that the following theories are significant enough to mean that he may be up to something.

Myth #1: He buys you gifts because he feels guilty about his actions.
Some say that a partner will feel guilty about their cheating and try to compensate their guilt though gift giving. Take advantage of the situation and ask for something really expensive. Keep the gifts coming! I don’t remember a single day that I was with my ex where he brought me a gift cause he felt guilty he was shagging someone else. If only guilt did that we would have the greatest wardrobe. Hey, if that’s the case, take your chances and ask for a Fendi bag and see what happens!

Myth #2: He spends a lot of time on the net.
So, he might be having cyber sex with someone else. What if he is just buying off e-bay or looking at online porn? In the worst case scenario, set up another computer account and join him as user name ’Candy’. You have just enhanced your relationship and gone to another dimension. You may actually add a little excitement to your relationship.

Myth # 3: Mutual friends may start acting different towards you.
Maybe he is telling them about where he got the back eye and making you look bad. Or maybe it’s your new perfume. Leave others out of your relationship. Concentrate on how he is acting and treating you.

SayNow you shouldn’t need any more signs than the ones that appear before you. Take into consideration that you would need more than one sign to be certain that he is cuddling with someone else at night. To be honest, if you have to go beyond these you know your relationship is doomed to fail. Either because of his cheating or because of your insecurity. The best advice I can give you is to try to understand where your partner is coming from and treat him with respect. If you believed he was cheating and, after reading this article, you are now convinced, confront him. Talk about it like mature adults. If he admits to it give him a black eye and if he denies it give him one for lying! This way you will know for sure why mutual friends are acting differently.


For relationship questions please Private message me on Hype1.com by clicking here your question may appear in our next article anonymously.


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Dear Eleni:
I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years. We have had a great relationship but recently he has been a little distant. He has changed a little towards me and wants to spend more time with his friends rather than me. I have tried talking to him but he keeps saying that nothing is wrong. When I ask him if he loves me he says more than anything but his actions say otherwise. I am so confused. I have a feeling he is cheating, what should I do? Can you please help?
Sincerely
Little Confused

Dear little confused:
I am sorry for what you are going through. I always say go with your gut feeling about something. If you think that he is cheating it may be that you have detected some things in his behavior that triggered this feeling. Investigate further in your own heart and mind and ask yourself why you feel this way. The best thing to do is give it time. With time the truth will be revealed. There is no point in asking him because, as you said, he has told you that there is nothing wrong. Therefore if he is cheating he most likely will never admit to it. Allow time to bring out the real person he is. Believe me, there are some things that you just can not hide and this is definitely one of them.
Sincerely
Eleni Neo

"Surely there must be some way to find a husband or, for that matter, merely an escort, without sacrificing one’s privacy, self-respect, and interior decorating scheme. For example, men could be imported from the developing countries, many parts of which are suffering from a man excess, at least in relation to local food supply." -- Barbara Ehrenreich


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Eleni Neo is a relationship expert. She’s a young, vibrant, 25 year old professional who has extensive experience in the dating scene and has been advising family, friends and colleagues for over a decade. She has a degree in psychology, with a specialization in behavioral matters, which gives her a unique perspective and understanding of human interactions and couple dynamics. Some of her hobbies include learning sign language and starting new business ventures.

In addition to her academic and professional credentials, she brings a buoyant personality, compassion and an in-depth knowledge of human behavior. She has her own dating column on the internet, where she has been providing dating tips for people and couples of all ages and backgrounds. Eleni is definitely attuned to the current dating world! Her philosophy is of the 21st century, modern and realistic. She tells it like it is and always with a little humor.

For relationship questions please Private message me on Hype1.com by clicking here your question may appear in our next article anonymously.
  Say Hello to Mr. Unfaithful - 7 signs he is cheating.
 
  Say Hello to Mr. Unfaithful - 7 signs he is cheating.
 
  Say Hello to Mr. Unfaithful - 7 signs he is cheating.
 
 
 
   
 
 
 
 
 
 
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